Gorillas and the Pissed in Bishops Cannings!

A minority of disgruntled villagers falsely accuse a pub of stealing a gorilla statue from Scotland to use as a memorial to a lost friend in order to sabotage their business….you can’t write comedy this gold…

Something fast becoming a legendary Bishop’s Cannings village vendetta, with a small minority of widely dispersed residents and others who simply like to whinge against the alleged evil of creating a lively community and often fundraising hub at their only public house, The Crown Inn, stooped to a new level of low this morning, as valuable police time was wasted when they reported a gorilla statue erected in the pub’s beer garden as a memorial was stolen….

The gorilla was hailed by most as a “wonderful gesture to remember their great friend, loyal customer and all round good egg Kevin Wilson who sadly passed away last year.” Kevin was a founder of the inaugural CrownFest last year but sadly passed away from cancer prior to the event; an emotional tribute to him was made by landlady Judith Macfarlane.

The critical few knew no bounds or respect for the significance of the gorilla when they set about slamming its presence in the beer garden as “inappropriate” on a local Facebook group. Yet no one could elucidate exactly why they found it so offensive, only that it was within the vicinity of the renowned St Mary the Virgin Church.

Whilst many a village pub in the county is suffering financial issues and forcibly being closed down, The Crown at Bishop’s Cannings has for the past two years enjoyed a lively community-driven ethos, with camping available and has become a flagship fully supported by a majority of villagers. But the handful opposed to new landlords, Judith and Gary, have attempted to sabotage their efforts since they took over the Crown.

They systematically complained about noise, a building application for an outside bar, and caused the pub to restrict its live music licence to the bare minimum. But last night, as the pub welcomed back celebrated acoustic duo Illingworth, who play with guitar and cajon combo, hardly executing a deafening noise, they rallied against the pub, digging up a BBC article about a similar gorilla statue stolen from a garden centre in Scotland, in March, tenaciously linked it to the pub’s statue and called the police to report it as the stolen artefact!

As if the idea of driving a giant gorilla statue all the way from Scotland to publicly display in a pub 500 miles away isn’t ludicrous enough, and a massive waste of police resources, landlady Judith explained the gorilla “has been here for over two months, just not out on display. We paid for him in December.” Three months prior to the mass-produced statue being stolen!

They bought him from a garden centre in Surrey, Judith told us, “The police needed to see the receipt.”

The Crown is to hold a second annual CrownFest on 8th July, after last year’s huge success. One resident told us, “The pub has had the busiest weekend of the year so far, and they want to ruin it for everyone.”

We’re of the opinion that it is a crying shame a minority wishes to spoil what little entertainment the village has, by consistently attempting to sabotage it, and they should count their lucky stars they have such a dedicated team behind their local pub, for it’s a rarity in our villages.

The level they will stoop to apparently knows no bounds when it subjects falsely reporting a memorial to police. But the pub shrugged the incident off as laughable, and with the insane allegation, they drove a stolen gorilla statue from Scotland to place in their beer garden, we tend to agree! It’s a King Kong cockup!!


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