Hey look, I’m done playing nice. Been good all year, but if Santa’s list starts afresh from now, I’m on for a bag of coal next yule; all in the name of honest opinion. I’ve been venturing elsewhere for entertainment, else hibernating like a little hedgehog, Saturday night before the big C, working hard, and all I ask is for a good night in Devizes, wet me whistle, and for that we have The Southgate, accept no substitute…..
Caught an early bus into D-town, it’s been a while. I thought hey, check out this Pour House I’ve been hearing about; much ado about nothing, what a premature wank into a sock that place is. Boasts the widest selection of drinks in town, and toffs gather there in a corridor to waffle shite, but I fact checked the bar, only one brand of cider. Best part of seven quid into Jeremy Clarkson’s grubby billionaire fake-farmer mitts, which wouldn’t be so bad if the owner had a grasp of basic manners.
In two words, legal tender. Young lad served my pint onto the bar and in turn I attempted to hand him a tenner. Grasping the glass as tight as he could, the owner intercepted and snarled “it’s card only!” With his other hand he thrusted his machine under my nose. Glaring at me like I’d murdered his family, he held his hand around the drink until the card machine accepted my payment and only then did he release it, without another word. Maybe someone inked the word “peasant” on my forehead, regardless, it wasn’t particularly welcoming; I ended up sitting outside, feeling I’d be exiled by class, drinking quickly and listening to the sound of the town hall’s tarpaulin wafting in the December wind.
Compare and contrast to my final destination, The Southgate, a benchmark of how to run a pub and stalwart of creating a welcoming atmosphere. I’m fondly greeted by bar staff, landlord Dave, and even George the dog acknowledged my presence in his own subtle way! Then my hard-earned cash is accepted and I’m served scrumpy at just over half the price than that of The “Poor” House, with a smile. By past experience I expected nothing less. Despite my recent absence, I feel at home, reunited; everyone is made to feel at home here.
For seven years the Southgate has held the title of the best pub in Devizes in my personal opinion, and still nothing seems to be available to challenge this. And for those seven years, Devizine has been reporting their dedication to local music fondly, with the wobbliest out of focus images any blog has ever provided the world over! What? I’m too busy having a ball; they looked alright at the time!!
Hats must also be tipped, though, to the longstanding king of pubs in town, The British Lion, the diverse offering of the Muck & Dunder, and to that of Simon and his hardworking staff at the Three Crowns, for providing the perfect lively option for the millennials. The Southgate and all these fine establishments go above and beyond to create an environment far beyond the replication of a front room, challenging the newfangled fallacy you’d be better off buying drinks from the supermarket and staying at home. If economically you might, socially you wouldn’t, and that’s the cornerstone of public houses; if a landlord abuses this, their pub will unfortunately not survive these days. For example, I went into a pub once, and they were watching Eastenders on the big screen. That particular boozer is no more. I rest my case.
If my criticism of this poor house feels a smidgen unfair, you should note I reserve my right to express an opinion, which this is. A better angle would be to point out its popularity and welcome any drinking establishment to town. In part I do, yet it is with concern that to normalise a bar which is unwelcoming or cherrypicks clientèle is damaging the reputation of the entire industry.
It sure is a busy week at the Southgate, but they retain their smiles. Wednesday saw likely the biggest turnout to the regular acoustic jam, virtually a whos-who of local musicians amassed. Thursday saw the monthly residency of the Jon Amor Trio shifted from its usual Sunday slot, whereas this Sunday sees groundbreaking local band Burn the Midnight Oil holding a charity fundraiser. This Saturday though, it’s “vintage blues with a hard edged groove,” from the simpatico Barrelhouse. If their style sounds niche, it’s apt to Devizes’ penchant for blues, and besides, they deliver it in such a manner it’s got universal appeal. An appeal which has made them favourites on the Marlborough circuit, their home turf, which has over the past couple of years spread to Devizes too.
Barrelhouse is also apt here, because a barrelhouse is another name for a juke joint, an Afro-American blues shack, and while the Southgate’s musical programme is diverse, it is more often than not, hosting blues or blues related rock, as this is favourite with the regulars. As the drinks flow, Barrelhouse evokes an epidemic of dancing, and the whole Southgate can be best compared to a juke joint. There’s good vibes all round, an amazingly communal and hospitable atmosphere; precisely what I came out looking for.
In the seven years I’ve attended the Southgate as regularly as possible, I have never, ever, heard one cross word, or seen a scuffle. Everyone is there to enjoy themselves, and that’s made easy with good management. If the music appeases the elder regulars, like rock or folk or blues, or if they’re introducing alternatives which attract more sporadic punters, the positive ambience of the Gate encapsulates them all, and they act in accordance. Be those times like when Monkey Bizzle brought us agricultural hip hop, or Devizes hometown teenage sensation Nothing Rhymes With Orange reduced the age demographic here, and any other of the plentiful examples I could give, the result is always the same, that being, it’s a hassle-free great night.
It’s the most dependable tavern I’ve ever warmed to, live music every Saturday, most Sundays, occasionally Fridays, then there’s acoustic jam Wednesdays, quizzes, and other weekday events. A hat for tips might occasionally be passed around, but no one has ever been asked to pay for a ticket. The Southgate has a carefree ethos, everyone is welcome, treated equally, and nothing is ever a problem; all this earns respect. Reasons that, despite the squeeze, musicians are queuing to play in this now legendary alcove. Dave showed me the list. They’re booked up till June, with various names listed aside acts which Dave would like to see returning but is struggling to fit them in.
Even with a fantastic Christmas party at Long Street Blues Club, Adam Woodhouse at the Three Crowns, and a busy schedule this weekend at the Gate, the crowds sign in to this eccentric, electric and humble watering hole, to drink, dance and be merry. The band members of Barrelhouse tell me how they love playing here, but it’s a compliment to the Southgate I’ve heard many times before by near-on every talented performer who’s graced us with their presence.
Long live the Southgate, and all who sail in her! In Devizes, accept no substitute…..
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