Pride month finds me wondering if Pride events are actually needed more in our smaller market towns where awareness and acceptance is perhaps lesser than in larger towns where diversity is tolerated more, but Prides are already established. Then I ponder deeper, if that’s even an accurate statement, and if it is, why many small town Prides seem to barely bathe a little toe in the water, or fizzle out after they do…..
From Bronski Beat’s poignant Small-Town Boy video to Little Britain’s ‘only gay in the village’ running joke, culturally there’s always been a consensus that anyone LGBTQ+ could fair a better life, even safer, in an urban environment. Ergo, while Prides may thrive in cities, in the sticks it’s harder to organise them effectively.
Add to this the economic downturn causing an increasing risk for any free event, the terrible notion with a rise of far-right philosophy infiltrating our councils, with negative tendencies towards Pride, pushing through permissions and gaining support for Prides might sadly lessen, particularly in sparsely populated areas with a minority of LGBTQ+.
While Pride in Bath is relatively new, and like Swindon Pride, happens in August, Salisbury’ Pride has events every weekend in June with a family gathering at Sloan Park on the 6th and Juneteenth on the 20th at The Bell Tower Green. However, Swindon Pride began promoting their events in June, this year seeing an inclusive virtual walking challenge. Pride is changing everywhere and offering alternatives to a carnival-style event.
Influenced perhaps by former mayor Declan Baseley, Chippenham holds very elaborate Prides, this year over the 13th-14th June weekend. But a spokesperson of Trowbridge Pride explained they were forced to reduce theirs to bingo evenings and pop up stalls. “We are in need of new volunteers to help bring our planned full sized festival to our town park,” they said.
My concerns for rural Prides stemmed from a Facebook post on a Marlborough group, gauging interest for a Pride there. Well, Pewsey held a Pride for a few years, but a Nathan told me it’s now reduced from a “full day” to a drag cabaret night, which is on 12th September.
While Calne have maintained theirs, and it’s this weekend, I cannot find anything on one in Melksham, and though Devizes held a few in previous years, due to the operation now running with one solo person, Oberan told me large-scale events are on hold. It’s great to note, though, this saddening trend is bucking on the canal, as boater community Floaty Boaty offers a Pride Parade & Picnic at The Bradford-on-Avon Wharf on June 20th.
Motivation might also be a factor for Pride’s decline. It must be disheartening to arduously labour over an event where the attraction for it is in the minority and organisers worry it cannot escape its niche. Whilst heterosexuals with an open mind might feel welcome at a Pride, I consider they’re lesser living rurally, compared to those who really need to reconsider their views on the matter. The numerous social media reactions to our article on if Wiltshire Council should fly the Pride flag suggested there’s many locally who do.
Comments flooded in on it, either airing views that they shouldn’t, generally using reasoning that whilst they’ve nothing against homosexuality, it’s not for councils to condone it, and counter arguments accusing them of homophobia. In fairness, aside from the irrelevant but expected patriotic flagwaving comments, in some suggestions where they didn’t want “their face rubbed in it,” conveys they’re either unaware of their ingrained homophobia, or they have the necks of giraffes, for how else could you rub someone’s face into a flag atop of County Hall?!
But Nathan provided a surprising alternative, saying “I have actually found that some of the gay community in our village are the ones who oppose it the most. They say they don’t need a “day” or “event” to celebrate who they are, and they just want to integrate into the community.”
If Pride is subjective, even for the LGBTQ+ community, and, I feel, in many circumstances it’s doubtful some leopards can change their spots, it is also clear many wish to celebrate the progress made, and being it’s taken the best part of 500 years to move from hanging gays, through imprisonment and from post illegality riddicle and hate, to an era where no one bats an eyelid to see same sex parnters on a TV game show, but social media holds a smoking gun for a gradual regression, I think it’s worthy of celebration. But, we know progress can often be slower in rural areas.
Does this make Prides in rural areas even more essential than urban areas? Or would it be better for those in rural areas to put their efforts and resources into assisting in larger towns’ established Prides, or forming collectives to host Prides each year in a different town within their group?
“I think combining prides is a great idea,” Nathan of Pewsey Pride agreed, “as it’s really hard to maintain our biggest issue; we are only a small village and finding the funding/sponsorship is really hard. We can’t put on events without it.” Although Nathan praised a partnership with Pewsey Carnival, “they help with liability insurance, etc, which can get frowned upon, that we aren’t solely a Pride event, but we couldn’t do it without their help.”
For encouraging other organisations to assist, especially those with a majority of straight members, a starting point could be to confirm Pride is inclusive, express the reasons for having Pride, and if any take precedence over the others. The conflicting two intentions must surely be: is Pride’s celebratory element paramount above raising awareness and attempts to cause heterosexuals to think differently? The former might cause criticism that it’s not inclusive for all, even though it is, and this, shamefully, answers the latter.
For heterosexuals, if attending a Pride allows them to walk in another’s shoes, it’s surely valid. Being straight, pondering all this found me reflecting personally, recalling a time that I did experience something akin to what it might feel like to be gay in a tight community complete with homophobes; the impact of isolation when I moved from suburban Essex to a Wiltshire village at thirteen. I was not made to feel welcome by many, because I was different. Culturally I was an outsider, and often treated with mistrust or ridicule, even threatened.
It may have been only a taster, not nearly as serious as issues gays have to deal with daily. Being I’ve integrated, I could shrug it off as tribal immaturity, call it water under the bridge, but in consideration, if it continued till this day, I must suppose it would affect me psychologically.
As (mostly) adults, urbanites might bellow out homophobic abuses unperturbed, as it’s a built up area you’re less likely to be known, whereas country folk in smaller communities might be more selective in mannerisms, to their face, but hold deeper and darker negative values bottled up and only exhausted privately between those likeminded.
Then I wonder if talking behind your back is possibly more upsetting, humiliating and damaging than someone throwing abuse directly at you? Either way, it’s why we need Pride, and we need Pride, in some format, be that wellbeing seminars and community building workshops rather than an all out carnival, in our rural areas equally, if not more.
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