Month: Apr 2020

If, like most, you need something to look forward to, The Devizes Outdoor Celebratory Arts, or DOCA as we love to know them as, having made some hard decisions, have come up with a new list of dates for their usual events; here’s to 2021! So, we are looking at an early date in the month of May, which coincidently rhymes with “hooray,” sort of, or at least enough to shout it!

Street Festival – Sunday 2nd May 2021 – 16:00 – 22:00

Last time I had the opportunity to chat with director Loz, she mentioned the plan this year was to move Sunday’s Street Festival from the Green to the Market Place, in case of bad weather and in hope to attract more. I am unsure if this will be carried out, but I’m certain it’s a bonza idea.

Street Festival -Monday 3rd May 2021 – 11:30 – 18:30

Best Monday, like ever. Dubbed by many, especially The British Lion as Black Rat Monday, it’s our most favoured annual date in Devizes and mere announcement of it leaves me tingling with excitement. Here’s hoping Vinyl Realm will continue as they planned this year, to hold a second stage of local music, and I’ve heard on the grapevine we might get even more than this. That’s all I can tell, anymore and I will be shot!

Colour Rush – Saturday 8th of May 2021 18:00 19:00
Confetti Battle – Saturday 8th of May 2021- 19:30 – 21:30

Again, we see these moved to a Saturday for practicality and the ease of attendance. There’s hope from DOCA that the bizarre custom of Confetti Battle will attract people from afar and place Devizes on the map of bizarre rituals and festivals, as it deserves to be, but would never happen on a weeknight.

Carnival Camp Saturday 3rd July

Location of the camp and times are to be confirmed.

Picnic in the Park – Sunday 4th July 2021 – times 12:00 – 17:00

Usually the event to kick off the festival fortnight, Hillworth Park will again be filled with activities, fun and music, just towards the end of the festivities this time.

Carnival – Saturday 10th July 2021- 17:30

So, the grand day itself, we are unsure if they will carry over what would have been this year’s theme, ‘Go Wild,’ but here’s hoping they will as it’s a cracker!
That’s all folks, I’m dusting off my festival jester’s hat in preparation, but Christmas first, OMG, I said it! Keep up to date with DOCA’s events on their website, here.

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© 2017-2020 Devizine (Darren Worrow)
Please seek permission from the Devizine site and any individual author, artist or photographer before using any content on this website. Unauthorised usage of any images or text is forbidden.

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Adverts & Stuff!

Clair Figes ponders celebrations after the lock down….

In France, around the midsummer Solstice, every town throws itself open to La Fete de la Musique. Throughout the country, bars and restaurants and village squares fill the pavements with tables, chairs, hay bales, trailers; and they book local musicians or bring amps & speakers out into the street and a night of music, dancing and general merriment ensues.
Most of us will eventually emerge from the current viral crisis. We’ll come stumbling back to normality, grateful to be released into the wild – but very aware that life has to go on and very, very many businesses will need to be restored in order to make that possible. That will probably include our own businesses – or those which employ us – or employ or care for our loved-ones.
There will also be an army of heroes who we want to thank: all NHS and care-home workers and all the people who’ve kept shops open, kept postal deliveries and bin collections going, kept our kids sane on-line, kept the surgeries & pharmacies going – the list goes on and on.

Can we combine all these needs?

When the lockdown ends, could we just crack open all the local hostelries and get musicians into all of them and onto the pavements outside and rope in all the street-food vendors still operating and just Play & Eat & Drink & Dance, putting money into the tills of all our pubs and cafes and the pockets of every food-stall and the hats of every busker and street entertainer?
In an ideal world it would just happen spontaneously, like it did on VE-day after WW2. But we may have a staggered release: some areas before others, the least vulnerable before the most vulnerable, etc… Also, the kitchens need to be stocked, the staff need to be recalled, the pumps need to be primed and the musicians need to be on hand, so a little advance planning would help.
And, crucially, if it happens on just one night, the wonderful key workers can’t all join in – because our hospitals and care-homes will still need to be staffed even through the celebrations. So we’ll need at least 2 days of celebration. I suggest that we ask the pubs, cafés, musicians, street performers, local Councils, etc. to be ready to take part in some way on the evening of the Summer Solstice: Saturday 20 June and again on Friday 26 June. And to organise some simple sort of voucher system so that wonderful people like NHS staff can get freebies all night.
If we’re still in lockdown a week before this celebration – just roll it all forward a week, then another …. And if we’re all released early, fine, we can have an earlier party as well. The more we celebrate, the faster we can get the small businesses back up and running. So tune your instruments and get your bunting out and aim for national street parties on 20 and 26 June.

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Ah, seems like a year ago now…. eh? Oh yeah, it was, nearly. With the second Devizes Scooter Rally teetering on the edge of cancelation, The Devizes Scooter Club still have their fingers crossed all will not be lost to the lockdown. After last summer’s amazing effort by the club to host the unforgettable first Devizes Scooter Rally, this highly anticipated sequel is booked in Rowde for 31st July, and we live with all the hope of Princess Leia that’ll it’ll go off.

For me personally, it was a thrill to see the posters and in particular, the big banners around the area, and I was honoured to have designed it. But you know, I get this low a lot designing event posters, knowing once the event is over, my poster is lost in time. Delighted then to see the Scooter Club is auctioning the very last Rally banner from last year.

Club colonel Adam Ford said “we would like to put it up for auction to raise funds for the NHS Charities Fundraiser.” 100% of the winning bid will be donated to the charity. The auction will end at 9pm on Friday 17th April. If you’d like this piece of history, nip over the Devizes Scooter Club Facebook page, like it and put your bid in the comments.

Do let me know if you buy it, I’ll be thrilled to know it has gone to a good home, and even more for such a good cause!

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How many Facebook groups can you get banned from in one day?! I have Norris McWhirter on stand by for a world record attempt. But as we’re locked down and online is the new going out, I thought it’d be a rather lovely idea to instruct on the confounds of local Facebook groups and pages. Maybe research a few new ones, as they vastly differ due to the ethos of the individual admin. So, here’s the lowdown, and I do mean low, of what group or page might be best for you, what content is best for posting on them, and what you will/won’t get away with on each.

I may well have bitten off more than I can chew with this pet project. Note this is not comprehensive and I will be adding further parts to it, covering more specific areas of interest. For the now, there’s enough general pages, debate pages and event pages to take us to kingdom come and back. Where Devizes once had more pubs than people, now, sadly, pubs close so quick you barely get time to finish your drink until antiques are wheeled in around you, and we now have more Facebook pages than people. The only real issue in Devizes is that there’s too many Facebook pages called the Devizes Issue, or similar; don’t cry for me Amanda Attwood the truth is, I never left you.

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The Devizes Issue

The original and still most popular general Devizes group is strictly monitored. Spamming, repeat posts and adverts are very restricted. Yet content remains solely and proudly local and it never allows dabbling in politics. It also operates a tight censorship rule where bad language or offensive content will see you banned immediately, the main reason why so many potty-mouths have decided to start their own variation on the idea. In a word: reliably presentable.

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The Devizes Issues

Never confuse this similar namesake with the original. Set up by those disgruntled at the rules of the uncompromising original, it stands as second most popular general Devizes Facebook group. Sadly, as it has progressed it has become just as strictly policed, if not more, but with an entirely different ethos. Content can be varied, sometimes not related to Devizes at all, rather prompting national headlines, but provided it follows an unembellished conservative agenda it’s fair game. It is extremely right-wing bias, though often denied by admin. As the page gets more popular it is more strictly regulated and items posted which do not meet either a local theme or appeases the admin’s own objective or conservative philosophy are deleted. In a word: Daily Mail of Devizes.

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The Devizes Debate

If a page is the sum of its members, the Devizes Issues has become right-wing by default, naturally representative of our Tory top-heavy area, the Devizes Debate was a hundred times worse. With subject matter rarely on a local fashion, a barrage of intimidation hailed over anyone with a differing opinion, and if they snapped back with a single insult, as naturally one would upon such ganged responses, they were witch-hunted towards the door. I received messages from locals genuinely concerned for their safety after expressing a leftist ideology. So, I abandoned it too as I confess, even I couldn’t handle the hypocrisy. The liberal admin tried their best to keep the peace, but decided to close it, new admins have taken over, but to be honest, I dare not venture back for my own wellbeing. In a word: the former Devizes Mein Kampf.

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Debating about Devizes

If you consider the Devizes Debate is hardly a debate at all, if every member has the same opinion and anyone with a differing one is despatched by via witch hunt, this page has the potential to be better. Sadly, though it only stands at 76 members and rarely posted on. Posts are as general as the Devizes Issue pages, events and campaigns, rather than notions to spur a debate as such, and as the member count is so low, rarely does an actual debate begin. In a word: nice tin, wrong label.

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Marlborough Opinions

Our neighbours show us how to run a debate page. At just over 600 members there really is a fair and equal demographic here, and though it can get heated, comments rarely get personal. Here’s a debate which works, community spirited, which upholds the cross section of society without flying daggers, just a few cross words, but it is Marlborough. In a word: cliquey opinionated.

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Devizes Issue

Take out the “The,” forget the plural, ironically this smaller of general Devizes groups is arguably the most effective and close to their original intent, though with only a handful of users its reach is like calling out of the window. It seldom does politics, hardly ever takes on a national issue, but it does either it’s usually satire and equally based. Generally, though, it is solely a noticeboard for the town, which is what the others are supposed to be. In a word: nice but inconsequential.

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The Devizes Issue (but better)

Just as the above, its non-political bias, and fairness indeed makes it better, as the title suggests, unfortunately with just over 900 users, its reach is anything but better. These two factors balance each other out, making it far from better in reality. In a word: fibbing.

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Spotted in Devizes

If you’re thinking hurrah, there is a local Facebook group which hasn’t plagiarised The Devizes Issue and figured its own name all by itself, you should note there are umpteen groups called Spotted in [enter town name.] Also, worth pointing out it’s a page rather than a group, the difference being you have to message the page and they will, hopefully publish your post. The upside is you can remain anonymous, the downside you never know if submissions will be published. As it is, the page seems to have dilapidated in its once popularity, with one person still persisting to post; namely Ronnie of the brilliant music promotions Marland. This is still a valid page then, if you want to know where Burbank will be playing next, but other than this and the odd missing dog, there’s little to write home about. I guess the move to groups rather than pages has seen its demise, but while it lasted it wasn’t so bad. In a word: spotty.

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spotted in devizes

Low and behold, someone threw what little originality in Devizes Facebook Admins there is to the wind and without the skill to muster capitalisation took the name and made a group out of the idea. This group has lower reach then the page of the same name, but is more widely used. It’s very liberal provided your post is locally related, and takes adverts and notices. Few seem to debate, few seem to squabble, surprisingly nice around really. In a word: spotless, except for basic grammar.

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Marlborough Notice Board

Again, our swanky neighbours show us up, like a Devizes Issue, but running pretty much solo in its town, so you need not browse two hundred local groups to get a comprehensive guide to what’s happening out there. Of course, occasionally the blindly ignorant wish to proclaim their love for Boris on it, but it does stick to its values well. In a word: oh, Marlborough.

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The Issues of Fucking Devizes

A complete spoof of all above, hence the “swearing is big and clever” title, lambasting the Devizes Issue’s rightful bad language regulation. Subject, for want of a better word is never about Devizes at all, and it prides itself on this and the ability to be completely offensive and rude without shame. For this unique stance I approve, but the angle taken is assertively far-right-wing, and to make a joke about anything other than this will see you hounded. Nice idea, discriminating and disgraceful stance. In a word: Viz for fascists.

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The Devizes Issue WTF

If I know my abbreviations, the What The Fuck in this group is what the fuck have you got to do to get in. Perhaps they know I’m plotting this article, perhaps it’s a redundant group and the admin are now living in the Seychelles, or maybe it’s a very exclusive club, as although I’ve applied for membership twice, I’ve still not gained entry. All I can say is that here is another clearly spoof page, and I have to ponder if The Issues of Fucking Devizes had a good idea but is used with nasty intent, perhaps there’s a fairer balance here, or is it just plain smut? If so, I’m up for that but fear I may never know, or care. in a word: my name’s not down.

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The Devizes Labour Campaign Group

There is some relief from the constant assault of neurotic Nazis in local Facebookland and here’s a place for alleged leftie snowflakes to let off steam and preach to the converted. Come here with your hard-on for Boris and you’ll be the one put to rights, finally. In a word: Corbyn’s Vest.

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Live Music Devizes

Did I start this off with edge and gradually cover the better ones as I went? Paul does a great job at hosting this Live music promotional page, which is exactly what happens on it, and only that. So, as we bludgeon through the list, note finding a page more specific you often find a nicer place to surf. Live music Devizes never gets narked off with Devizine, we’ve never seen bad blood, nor even needed to communicate very much to know we’re singing off the same song sheet. Join this page for further news and events, you never know I may have missed something on Devizine, but hardly likely! In a word: musical goodness.

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Devizes Events

Again, here’s a specific one, lesser so as the above and events can include any events, as it says really. No harm here that’s for sure, feel free to post event news and happenings, or as it is presently, cancelations. There is little more to the group than this, but that is precisely what it is set out to do. In a word: Yeah, I’m going out.

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Devizes Musicians and Performers

If live music Devizes takes on, generally, pop genres, this one will fill the theatrical, choirs and musicals and that type of thing. Maybe therefore less cool, but equally as popular for its broader horizons as it covers all which the latter does as well. In a word: doe a deer, a female deer.

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Marlborough Music

If you thought I’d finish on a high note, with only praise for a Facebook page, that’s simply not my style. Facebook is like Vice City, dude, respect needs to be earned. I gave up with Marlborough Music, they got rather cliquey with me, like fagging a St Johns pleb with a ruling class college nose in the air. The trouble kicked off because I was posting my weekly roundup post, which informs everyone over the area we cover what is happening in their town. Seems like if it’s not about music in Marlborough it’s unwelcome. Their prerogative, and that is, after all what it says on the tin, but my notion it’d be too time consuming to create a post for each town, was met rather rancorously.

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That’s enough for now, there are many other Facebook groups and pages I can slag off, or praise where praise is due, which I will. So, expect a further part to this, one at least; if you think you’ve got away with it, page admin of one I missed here, think again! Twitter though is a safe zone, and Instagram I need my daughter to be my social media manager on, hence it’s probably full of pictures of me acting like a twat. I’ll check it one day, but I’m a one social media site kinda guy.

If you ever feel contemporary soul music has lost its way somewhat, do yourself a favour, check out Mayyadda from Minnesota and it’ll instantly change your mind.

Soothing soul that will make those little hairs on the back of a neck stand to attention. Singers who can do this are a rarity, I nod to Otis Redding, Toots Hibbert, Louis Armstrong, Aretha Franklin, Nina Simone and Marvin Gaye, yet I find few to take us to the modern day. Mayyadda is that equivalent.

She shares her music freely on Bandcamp, she deserves all the gold her voice personifies. Aware my ageing tastes cannot identify with modern RnB, and detest the notion it’s even labelled thus as it barely compares with the original sound of rhythm and blues, but from the very opening of Mayyadda’s short album, Holding Space, I was captivated, heart and soul.

It is the perfect nu-cool, the musical version of after sun on sunburnt skin, the whirl to uplift a sour Sunday morning start.

It’s grades above whatever soul pops on radio, or stylised in nineties trip hop, from Portishead to Morcheeba, Macy Grey to Heather Small, which while that era’s sound holds me in, Mayyadda breathes it out with a chill of freshness and hope for soul music in the now. It is, in a word; gorgeous.

https://mayyadda.bandcamp.com

Formerly of Larkin, Devizes singer-songwriter Sam Bishop has been making use of the isolation period by writing and producing a new song called ‘One of a Kind.’ Sam tells us this single “is about being away from loved ones during isolation. My aim to is release it everywhere, with all profits going to the Trussell Trust, a fantastic charity which provide emergency food and assistance for those in need.”

In order for Sam to release the song, and raise as much money as possible, he requires the necessary funds to cover distribution costs, so he’s started a Crowdfunder campaign. “The amount needed isn’t huge,” he continues, “so any small donation would be really appreciated. I’ve always wanted to release a song for charity, and this is my time to do my bit!”

Now residing in Winchester to study music, Sam’s solo career really kicked off at the end of last year, with the release of his debut EP ‘Cold Kingdom’ on all music streaming platforms. “It received such an overwhelming response and I was completely blown away but the support and positive feedback from it,” Sam explained. “This song is unlike anything I’ve ever written before, and I’ve never released a demo. I wrote and produced the song in just a day, and I feel like the lyrics really do convey my emotions and feelings perfectly. Being away from the people you love is never easy, and you just want to tell them how you feel. I feel like the demo version is the perfect version to release, as it was made only using software and tools I have, written by me, all during this hard time. It’s raw, it’s rough, but it will hopefully speak to you.”

You can you help Sam release “One of a Kind,” by donating just a small amount via the link here. Sam has a new band in the workings and we look forward to a time when he can introduce us to the members in what will be a highly anticipated homecoming gig. Until such a time, best of luck with the crowd funding, can’t wait to hear the One of a Kind, which is what you truly are, Sam and here’s to a brighter day.

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Adverts & That!

This weekend I find myself toiling with the idea of this virtual festival, and essentially, the direction Devizine has to take as a whole. Its awkwardness at bestowing the mandatory features for online presentations, the quality and quantity of online events being released, and my time management in presenting it all sufficiently and fairly, while working extra hard in my real job. Seems every man and his dog are live streaming, and the ones the dogs do often more entertaining.

What begun as the creative doing what they can, and entertaining us with their talents seems to have been lost in a saturated Facebook feed of drunks bobbing around their kitchen; that’s not, I believe, what you ordered. At the beginning of this lockdown I reserved myself to the fact it’s currently all we have, now I fear, it’ll do worse than bore and advance the party longing to riotous levels.

I took to repudiating Facebook last night, tried to forget its very existence. I relied on the antiquated entertainment source, television. Ah, can’t say it was all bad; money-spinning predictable Hollywood bile that it was, the family sequel entertained me enough to keep my eyelids open. I confess I’m not a fan of gluing myself to the box. In an ever-changing era, I intend to press on with this regardless, pondering where to take the idea next.

I reflect, people warm to Devizine, yet the virtual festival is not the original ethos of it; damn I wanna go to the pub and return with a sore head to write a review of the band who played there! Apologises if this all sounds rather despondent, yet presenting this virtual festival as more than a live stream by added features, I think, is valid. I draw your attention to the artist’s contributing to our gallery pages, and the beer tent and food hall pages prompting local businesses still operating in the area to let me know their details so we can build a directory, of sorts.

All you need do is drop me a message if you’re a business still operating who wishes to take advantage of this virtual noticeboard; few bothers to, though. Making me doubt it’s worth and consider perhaps it’s my total ignorance and incapability at modern websites. I know, dammit Jim, I’m a writer not a web designer; just doing what I can.

On the other hand, I find the mass of guidance, information and entertainment online is wafting past us unnoticed not because there’s so much of it, but from people’s failure, or lack of desire, to want to integrate their ideas. Take the amount of local Facebook groups as symbolic of this, if you disagree with the regulations of one, you create your own. How many Devizes Issues pages do we need? You do realise not everyone bothers with Facebook?

So, here’s an idea developing, which was my original intention of writing today, I genuinely hope it gathers pace. A free, one-stop directory for local small businesses who don’t have the clout of the big guys has been set up. Presenting In-Devizes, not my pet project, so expect a website superior to this strung-together-with-virtual-string one!

The creator of In-Devizes, Ida McConnell “hopes it will evolve into a much bigger thing,” hence my notion to integrate. Could this be the ideal opportunity to highlight and promote your business through this hard time? I hope so, but it needs your attention, it needs all to contribute details in order to make it comprehensive and therefore a valid resource. The ethos goes along the lines of, “if you don’t have a website, don’t do Facebook or are otherwise suffering from competing with the big guys during the COVID lockdown, this is the place for you.”

I submitted details of Devizine on there, a simple and quick process, I urge you to do likewise. A building directory open to categories, prompt people towards your business. As I really feel it’s time to stop spamming Facebook individually and crossing your fingers that someone will browse past it. If this lockdown has presented us with anything positive it’s the notion that if we work together, we can provide a service, we can entertain and help each other out.

Stay safe, as the saying goes, but also, contemplate my thought for the day, let’s integrate our resources. Please support upcoming projects like In-Devizes, and of course, Devizine too. Use the resources set up, such as Devizes Covid19 Support. Please, do click on our links to Bandcamp or other and buy local music, phone a local business and grab a takeaway, brighten your walls with some art from our gallery, and most of all, inform us your ideas, businesses and projects. Let’s stay safe, yes, but let’s also keep our heads up and enjoy our days too; virtual hugs, for all they are worth.

Our recently elected MP Danny Kruger told Devizine exclusively he will stand down next year and allow Boris Johnson to take control of the Devizes constituency.

Danny messaged the office yesterday, sadly heartfelt he informed Devizine he planned to stand down and hand the baton to Boris in a move predicted by fleeing local conservatives during the election. “Being as Devizine has supported my campaign from the beginning,” Danny expressed, “and there’s little doubt those Gazelle & Herod rascals will plagiarise this story anyway, I thought it best to tell you about my decision first.”

We are saddened to hear of Danny’s decision, but look forward to being treated like vermin by the Prime Minster himself. Mr Kruger explained, “it’s not just about the lardy cake, though it is pretty rank. I just feel I’ve not really made an impact on the people of Devizes. I tried to belch up kebab meat and chips along Morris Lane on a Friday night after twenty something Bacardi Breezers down the Crown, but it’s just not me. I’ve hung my dog poo bags on the trees in Drew’s Pond woods like everyone else, I’ve even climbed Rose’s facade and pretended to drive the lawnmower on top of it, but I’m just not cut out for life in Devizes. It’s either a miracle or via Google maps that I even know of these places, and I’m just not at home without a Starbucks drive-thru.”

Mr Kruger, who is nicknamed Danny K by his infamous amateur rap band, went onto explain, “I never felt I could replace Claire, just haven’t got the legs for it. Nor does my good-stock babyface allow for malicious stares and random outbursts, as she was so well respected in the community for.” Danny took the example of when Claire Perry was viciously tapped on the shoulder by a dangerous leftie snowflake during a surgery in Morrisons. “How she called the police that day, to inform them of her attack was nothing short of heroic. If it had been me who was assaulted like that, I’d only have given off a sound akin to a squeaky dog toy.”

His frequent visits to the neediest entrepreneurs and wealthy businesses will be sadly missed. Upon being quizzed about our homeless charities and food banks, Mr Kruger replied, “it was on my to-do-list, but then we had this lockdown thing, honest. Stay in your homes homeless people and I’ll get around to seeing you in a local wine bar soon, but I insist, it’s your round.”

Boris Johnson is said to be thrilled to be moving from the Uxbridge constituency, what he deemed full of “deplorable chavs” and plans to buy a second, or maybe third home in Urchfont, which is so swanky even the road signs are thatched. “I have visited Dewotizits,” he stated, “and didn’t see any Remainer scum, walking letter boxes, or one watermelon smile, which is nice. Just lots of happy Brexiters, so if Brexit doesn’t work out in the UK maybe Dewotizits could get Brexit done on its own.” Then he waffled some impenetrable baloney about Lord Horton’s relationship with an ancestor of his, pledged to save our NHS twenty-seven times over, and how delightfully working-class Chick-o-Land is, until our reporter dropped dead from boredom.

We look forward to seeing Boris’ gold-digger, sorry, I meant girlfriend, Carrie Symonds shopping in Lidl and ranting about spitting teenagers on the Devizes Issues. Admin of the popular Facebook page, Sir Iain Wallis, praised the decision and gave a rambling announcement basically declaring, “anyone who dares to criticise Boris or Carrie on my nonbiased Facebook page I’ll verbally dice into small pieces with my academic wit, so there.”

Boris expressed on social media, “Locally, I will personally build a supermassive train station, airport, and ferry port, just off Sidmouth Street. I also want to get to the bottom of this place in the parking of the market, or whatever you bumpkins are on about with that, whatever it is,” and called for “Dewotizits, Marlborough and Pewsea” to have Boris bikes, as in London; “just with fatter tyres to withstand all the potholes.” Unaware we already have plenty of usable town bikes, at the Bin, for the cost of a vodka & Red Bull.

On social media, where Boris initially announced the plans, he was promptly welcomed by all, expect for Amanda Attwood who banned him from The Devizes Issue for using the word “bottom.”

Mayor Judy Rose will welcome Boris to our constituency on 1st April 2021, aptly All Fools Day, with a plush champagne reception and town council ceremony, kindly paid for by council tax revenue. All councillors will be present to give Boris virtual hugs, but the public will not be invited. Local businessman Iain Wallis was angered by the news. Crying outside the Town Hall, he whispered, “it should’ve been me who kissed his ring, that is the final straw, teddy bears assemble!”

Recently converted fascist, Morrissey is said to entertain at the event, with party games such as pin the slander on Corbyn, pass the NHS parcel to a US medical company and a Donald Tusk pinata, as hosted by filthy Islamophobic Katie Hopkins. “I usually cry in the kitchen at parties,” Danny said, “but this one should be an awfully spiffing blowout bash, and we’ll end up down Spoons, no doubt, or any other commercial pub chain which doesn’t pay its employees, if there is one.”

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© 2017-2020 Devizine (Darren Worrow)
Please seek permission from the Devizine site and any individual author, artist or photographer before using any content on this website. Unauthorised usage of any images or text is forbidden.

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